This morning, standing outside in my bathrobe coaxing a young bird out of our apple tree, alternately flapping my elbows and waving a syringe full of lukewarm oatmeal, it suddenly occurs to me that I have gone mad. Quite, quite mad. I know. It should have occurred to […]
Hi there! I am an American who washed up on the shores of England over 25 years ago. I decided that if my life is an open book anyway, I better start writing some of it down before I get too old to remember that I enjoyed most of it. And if I can make you choke on your bagel or snort coffee out your nose from time to time, I feel I have succeeded in my mission here. Someone has to do it. Welcome to the comedrama dust bath that is my life...
I’ve never made a secret of the fact that I come from a long line of hunters. Well, at least that’s what I’ve always been led to believe, and growing up in close proximity to my dear old Grandpa, this fact took on a mythical quality. Many an […]
You don’t get to be my age without learning a few hard lessons in life. Granted, I’m (only) 52, but given the fact I am weirdly accident prone, who knows whether today I might trip over a rollerskate and puncture my jugular on a drinking straw? In case […]
I’m not sure if any of you are aware of it or not, but there is a war going on in The Castle these days. It has been raging for months, actually, but since I am not particularly fussed by six-legged creatures, I have not felt it necessary […]
There are wonders to be found In a gilded wood Damp in melted frost, Awash with ancient sunshine, Alive with the chattering rush of squirrels, The honking goose, Birdsong of a thousand melodies, The subtle crunch of damp leaves And hidden bogs of sucking mud. My breath rises […]